Monday, January 23, 2012

page 92

eats the crowd Rome instead of over there as if right here feeding the tiger arms and legs the parts that fell of the humans those who paid tickets to witness their demise how sad when you think of it they came to be entertained by the tiger but they became devoured by the tiger the tiger was hungry and stronger than the cage Rome is an image a feeling in the gut a premonition if you will a story that has never been told I agree with tonya that there little bits of brilliance that comes and goes we ride upon its wave the tiger swims after us and drowns formed by names of objects and names of relationships let us have a good laugh together as tonya goes to the bathroom she is worried about her breasts sagging about her getting old about the coming snow storm about the coming war about the singularity about the hair on hugo’s back I call it a world because the names are rigid knowledge can lead one to abandon the name to replace it with others more potent than the first thus George was changed to Martin because of the power I have a faded star on my left upper arm from back when I used to believe that evil was embodied in some supernatural entity now I realize that evil is human and not anything beyond human we encompass the fullness of evil and try to deceive ourselves and others by making up this cartoon character that we can blame our wrongs on it wasn’t the devil that made me do it I fucking did it on my own free will I was an evil fuck I hurt others I did stupid fucking things I was a  barbarian who would smash your face in for being different than me or for challenging me or for giving me a hard look sometimes I was evil just for the fuck of it I enjoyed it fucking with people there is a sadistic tendency inside of me I recognize that I try to keep that part of my personality down not let it out I used to rejoice in my being evil now I try to be more human than animal I’m not that caged tiger any more I won’t bite I promise maybe just a little bit if you ask me nicely no one has ever set foot in Utopia this is Caesar to signify is one things to name another and to show still another she lost her ability to put the brakes on she is only one speed now supper fast speed of light fast she is a flash she will cut you before you can apologize think before you get all ignorant up in her face because she has no stop mechanism the little school girl will hurt you the day after I got my tattoo a witch called me up and said the devil told her to call me we started going out after that and as always we went our separate ways she told me that she had a boyfriend that used to beat her I didn’t know how to respond I didn’t know what she wanted me to do now I realize that she wanted me to beat her she wanted me to take his place she wanted to be dominated and controlled I didn’t understand that then I didn’t know about dominance and submission back then under the regimen of descriptive the meaning is not always presented becoming the object of a description did she open the door the door has been opened we are not making amends for the lies and the atrocities that I perpetrated upon humanity against my brothers and sisters we will let then cards fall as they may and react accordingly everyone who shares my blood my spirit those who I can call trusted souls mutual spirits those whose hearts contain the same emptiness who have the same dragon within I remember that I gave my dragon a name but I don’t remember what it was I wrote it in the front cover of

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